Science experiment: Who is easiest to summon?
Egberts?
Pizza?
John Green?
A vegan?
The only way to find out is to reblog and wait. Wait patiently. Just wait. It will be good I promise.
fuck you vegans aren’t your source of entertainment you animal killers.
and the vegan wins

a venn diagram of the things george washington said not to do and the things america did would be a circle
this might actually be my favourite post on tumblr
i can’t stop laughing
how do bees keep their hair looking nice?
A HONEY COMB!
bees don’t have hair…
A HONEY COMB!!
I live in Osaka, Japan and often use the subway to go to work in the morning. One day, when I was waiting for the train, I noticed a homeless man standing in a corner of the subway station, muttering to himself as people passed by. He was holding out a cup and seemed to be begging for spare change.
A fat woman passed by the homeless man and I distinctly heard him say, “Pig.”
Wow, I thought to myself. This homeless man is insulting people and he still expects them to give him money?
Then a tall businessman went by and the homeless guy muttered, “Human.”
Human? I can’t argue with that. Obviously, he was human.
The next day, I arrived early at the subway station and had some time to kill, so I decided to stand close to the homeless man and listen to his strange mutterings.
A thin, haggard-looking man passed in front of him and I heard the homeless guy mutter, “Cow.”
Cow? I thought. The man was much too skinny to be a cow. He looked more like a turkey or a chicken to me.
A minute or so later, a fat man went by and the homeless man said, “Potato.”
Potato? I was under the impression that he called all fat people “Pig”.
That day, at work, I couldn’t stop thinking about the homeless man and his puzzling behavior. I kept trying to find some logic or pattern in what he was muttering.
Perhaps he has some kind of psychic ability, I thought. Maybe he knows what these people were in a previous life. In Japan, many people believe in reincarnation.
I observed the homeless man many times and began to think my theory was right. I often heard him calling people things like “Rabbit” or “Onion” or “Sheep” or “Tomato”.
One day, curiosity got the better of me and I decided to ask him what was going on.
As I walked up to him, he looked at me and said “Bread.”
I tossed some money into his cup and asked him if he had some kind of psychic ability.
The homeless man smiled and said, “Yes, indeed. I do have a psychic ability. It is an ability I obtained years ago. But it is not what you might expect. I can’t tell the future or read minds or anything like that.”
“Then what is your ability,” I asked eagerly.
“The ability is merely to know the last thing somebody ate,” he said.
I laughed because I realized he was right. He said “Bread”. The last thing I had eaten for breakfast that day was toast. I walked away shaking my head. Of all the psychic abilities someone could have, that one must be the most useless.
—
What makes this story creepy? Think!
This story wasn’t creepy what the fuck are you
JAKGJSDKGJAGHLA OH MY GOD
hoLY
Why is it creepy? SOMEONE EXPLAIN
edit: WAIT
WELL OKAY THEN THAT TOOK ME A SECOND
voldemort was real dumb make your horcrux like one brick in some random ass house in turkey whos gonna look there

This was recorded by the Portsmouth Sinfonia in an experiment where all the members of the orchestra would swap instruments with each other and attempt to play them to the best of their ability.
This is the result. And it makes me laugh every single time.

i’ve read a lot of destiel fics now and the only constant in them is sam encouraging dean and cas to get together and then ollie outing/making :| faces when it actually happens
here is his saga
i gave up on facial consistency and accuracy after the second panel…

#like seriously there is nothing you can do or say #I was Mark Zuckerberg’s PR #and karma has tried to repay me with being flawless #and is still like shit son we’re really sorry is there anything else we can do? #~try me~
I’ve come upon a mental block. What name is given to those of the supernatural fandom? Is there a name? The doctor who fans are whovians, then there are the sherlockians. What are the supernatural fans?
masochists

LOOK WHO I JUST ADOPTED ON NEOPETS
I AM LAUGHING SO MUCH OH MY GOD WHAT